End of swap two and beginning of swap three: Triple trouble

Two months into my habit swap and am I healthier and more positive? Yes and no. No and yes. I'm not sure whether I'm just picking impossible things to change, whether my system isn't quite working or if my intent just isn't strong enough. I have a sneaking suspicion it's the last one. I feel the universe is observing my attempts, and wickedly throwing obstacle's at me that affect that very thing I'm trying to change. I feel like Mario in Mario Brother's when he accidentally eats those poisoned mushrooms and dies. But we all know that Mario has an extra life he can use to get back to his mission, or he doesn't and the worst that can happen is that he has to start over. Let's say that in my version I had some extra lives but the level got a lot harder cause I lost one.

I've had a lot going on this year; constant travel, navigating a new environment, health problems and much more. I've struggled with finding the structure I need in a new place and the lack of it has taken it's toll. This habit swap is definitely supposed to help with that, but I feel that too often than not I only apply it when it's convenient for me. None of the things I've picked to work on are easy, so they won't be changed easily and I know that. I gotta get real.

Starting tomorrow I'm tripling down. That means I'm taking the last two habits I've tried to swap; poor health and negativity and going turbo on month three whilst still adding a third habit to swap. I will write about all three every week in order to hold myself accountable. If I manage this for 28 days I will continue after that with focusing on changing one habit at a time.

So what's the next habit I'm adding to this vortex?

I watch waaay too much TV and spend faaar too much time online doing nooothing of substance.

I love TV. I am TV's wife, mistress and bff, cross my heart and hope to die, screens are thicker than blood, viva la television! I love TV so much i'm even on it. I'm not on TV, watching TV like the lucky bastards on Gogglebox, but I'm as involved with my TV as I can possibly be. That rhymes. It's been a lifelong companionship that I cherish deeply, but like with so many relationships they can sometimes end up being toxic. As much as I love this pastime activity, it has become too accessible to me at all times. I both celebrate and curse the day my parents bought me that beautiful shiny box for my confirmation present and suddenly I had solo access from the comforts of my own bed to watch whatever I wanted for as long as I wanted. Sort of. I'd wolf down a Mars bar and some Mountain Dew and marvel at that black beauty until my parents came into my room threatening to take it away if I didn't turn it off and go to sleep. No wonder I have bad habits, I've been doing a version of this for over a decade! Not the Mountain Dew though. Gross. And man oh man is it a time vacuum. "Let's watch an episode of Sex&TheCity it's only 20 minutes. Let's do one more. One more. Just one more". Before I know it it's bed time and the writing hasn't been done and dishes are still in the sink, not getting washed until morning. TV is awesome but it obliterates time. It also gives us access to way too much content. I don't need to see another talent show about musicians trying to make it but I will. I will sit my ass down and choose a favourite participant to root for and deduct at least 10-15 hours of the next month of my life for something I will never think about as soon as it's over. And once it is over, I gotta deal with my own reality or choose something new to sink my apathy into. For me, TV is an escape. Escape from reality is wonderful when we see a brilliant film or a stage show or anything really. As long as we come out of it once it's finished and go back to dealing with the real stuff. I feel my consumption of TV inhibits me from doing that too often. Included in this is mindless scrolling on my phone and laptop through social media or websites with articles on the next best food delivery service or body scrub or Justin Bieber is engaged and are Brad and Jen back together? I've actually googled that. It doesn't matter. Any of it. All of it can be fun yes, but moderation is key. I need that key.

My goal for the next 28 days is to cut my screen time down massively and follow strict rules. I intend to swap this habit with anything more constructive and creative. I will prioritise work, exercise and other projects every day and if I have downtime, instead of watching TV I will read one of the many books I have started and not finished, discover new music, play my records and paint or knit or anything but staring aimlessly at a box of light that influences me in a lot more ways than I would like to believe.

THE RULES

• No phone in the mornings. Meditation and breakfast first. No Instagram scrolling. None. I'll post my own stuff but no scrolling for 28 days.

• No TV at all. Only exception is The Bachelorette on Mondays. I'm sorry, I've committed to this season I gotta see it through. That is my one allowance. Cold turkey is too hard people! Going to the cinema is ok if everything else on the priority list has been checked off but even then I'm going to try and see a show or a concert instead.

• No laptop or phone in bed at night. I'm gonna leave them charging in the other room.

• 28 days of no alcohol and only healthy, nourishing foods.

• 28 days of focused intentional positivity including meditation every day.

I think I'll go and get one of those old school calendars so I can physically cross off each day. Maybe I can get one with Brad and Jen on it. I'll report back in a couple of days but now I have some very important business to attend to: The Bachelorette.

Let's get that rose on.

H