End of swap three. 28 days later, and then some...

I do apologise for a very late post and sporadic updates this past month. These past two weeks have been a whirlwind. I am back in London for a new gig I'm very excited about and had to relocate from LA for the time being. My focus this last month was to combine the last three months into one super challenge and see if I couldn't tackle all my habit swaps at once. Spoiler alert: I can't.

Conclusion:

HEALTH

Ok, I'm gonna come clean. Full disclosure; I suck at this bit. I am a master of failure in this category. I am a masochistic extremist when it comes to health. And by that I mean, I swing from one end to the other like Tarzan on a rope in the jungle. Except I'm not buff like Tarzan cause I never stick to exercise long enough. I never find a middle ground. I'm either a beacon of self righteous, vegan, gluten free, macrobiotic Hollywood nonsense, or I'm salivating in my bed as I order chocolate chip cookies as a side on the Domino's menu.

"Attention! insane person in the organic health food isle... oh no wait, she's now by the junk food... catch her before she destroys the nacho cheese pyramid!". The extreme nature of my approach whenever I try and tackle this issue as always the same: If I slip up, I never shrug it off and keep going; I go, "well, this day is ruined, I might as well sink my face into a tub of donuts while I down a bottle of merlot and start again tomorrow". But then I don't. I just keep going down Donut Street until reality slaps me in the face and I'm back on the mean green juice machine. So where am I at with all this right now? Like always; all over the place. I need to have a long hard think about how I can approach being healthy in a different way. Because like Einstein said: "The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. I still believe in the habit swap, but this one might need a little extra attention. I'll keep trying and will keep you posted.

SCREEN USE

Ok, This one I think was a little too broad for me. It was very obvious early on, what wasn't gonna stick. At the end of the day, TV makes me very happy. Watching a good film or a brilliant show is one of my favourite things to do when I unwind. And by putting it on as last on my list of priorities, it felt even more fun when I did watch something cause I felt like I earned it. So as long as it doesn't get in the way of more important things, I don't see the harm. I did manage to stay away from social media scrolling most of the time although I have to admit this last week has been so intense in other ways that I've found myself seeking hypnotic mental breaks by watching Korean girls on Instagram eat strange food whilst they record the sound of their chewing, or watching people play with slime. Yep. Just glittery, gooey slime. It's weirdly hypnotic and satisfying. I know, it's super weird but just try it and get back to me. I bet you'll get sucked in. Regardless of doing that I feel I've definitely adapted some new and better habits like reading more, listening to more music and just being more mindful in general of what I'm doing when I'm on my laptop and phone. So I'd say all in all, a partial success.

POSITIVITY

Yes! Somehow I figured this one out. It was really hard and the reason I decided to repeat this challenge along with the other two in the first place is because the positivity round one hadn't gone as planned. I think the reason for the success of this one was just timing and sheer determination. And by no means is this something that just sticks forever once you get there. No one can be positive all the time. It is human to suffer. But from suffering come some pretty amazing things sometimes.

Here is what I owe my positivity boost to:

• Meditation. Number one two and three. I still miss out days sometimes and I can feel the difference when I do. But I've also gotten to a place with it now that if I start to go down a negative spiral I'm truly capable of separating myself from my thoughts, stepping back and readjusting. I think I'll add in another session in the afternoons to break up any spiralling thoughts.

• Knowing my triggers. Both good and bad. I'm more aware of how things affect me now. For instance, I love this true crime podcast 'My Favourite Murder' but listening to something like that for hours at a time, absolutely messes with my head! I couldn't leave the house without being convinced the barista at my local cafe would follow me home and try and kill me in the laundry room of my apartment building. I was afraid to do laundry for weeks! Now, I regulate heavy stuff like that and make sure I'm aware of the influence every content has on me. That means I also make sure I watch and listen to things that are funny and uplifting as they can totally do their share of helping me stay positive and upbeat. Just don't be falling asleep to stuff American Horror Story, please! It will mess you up.

• Intention. I've been full of intention lately. It's being complacent that can be damaging and a slippery slope for all of us. So now I've gotten into the habit of asking myself "what is my intention?" For myself, for my partner, my career, my family, the world... I put the intention out there and I allow myself to get excited about achieving that goal. It may sound wanky, but if you put it out there, and trust in it, it will come back to you. And that goes for good and bad. So if it's really up to us, I'd rather get some loving vibes from the universe and laugh myself to sleep than to cry of terror behind the washing machine, convinced barista man will get me tonight. I'll take rainbows and unicorns any day, thanks very much.

So all in all, I'd give myself a 2 out of 3 in this challenge, or maybe like a 1,5 as the screen use wasn't quite what I intended it to be. But that's still a tie, and a tie is better than losing so it's basically a win. See? Positive spin here... Thank god I'm the only contestant and referee in this game.

Stay tuned for my next challenge that I'll announce very soon.

H